Cani e porci hanno il proprio blog, quindi anch’io!

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Archive for July, 2007

Life’s good

Wednesday, July 25th, 2007

So, I am an aging ex-cankerous self, it turns out: my test results show a wreck of a woman, but hey, I feel good! I have osteoporosis of the spine (apparently dr. Faith thinks it’s unrelated to the chemo/radiation); diverticulosis of the colon; hemangiomas in the liver (benign tumors); a septate or arcuate uterus; and have been thrown in sudden, but very possibly unreversible menopause. Worse of all, I have gained at least 14 pounds since the start of radiation! Most of this stuff is apparently associated with aging… Dr. Faith was surprised a woman my age would have all this, a ‘young’ woman she said, ‘you are too young for this!’ I guess life aged me beyond belief. And me, I had dared to think I was invincible and eternal. But I have no fucking cancer left that they can tell (also known as No Evidence of Disease – aka NED – a dear word to us cancer victors/survivors/patients – best we can get!). Dr. Faith wants to keep the liver under scrutiny, just in case, but so far so good. But because of the menopause/chemopause and the osteoporosis, she also advised me against the clinical trial I had agreed to be on: not good for bone density, I would have to wait until and *if* I got my periods back to start medication, and I couldn’t be on medication for osteoporosis if I wanted to. So we went with the standard treatment, which is tamoxifen, a medication that blocks natural estrogen from getting to estrogen-feeding cancer receptors (for types of cancer, like mine, which feed on estrogen). I will also have to limit (not completely, but be careful about) soy (we have too much in our diets anyway) and grapefruit intake , because they contain (or stimulate production of?) estrogen. And I will have to start taking extra calcium supplements to see if my osteoporosis gets better. OK, sushi will be a treat, not a habit from now on… wait a second… wasn’t it before?

So now, according to my bc support list, I am transitioning from the WIMP award level for cancer victors (“Why I’m miserable and puking”), to the MITT level (“Made it through treatment!”), which will come soon enough, on Sept 25th, exactly one year after diagnosis. I made it!!! And my sisters and their children are here. And we’ve already laughed together, cried together, screamed together at our children, be horrified together at my scars and mutilations, but mostly enjoyed each other’s company, no string attached, just a lot of love. Can’t get better than this, I tell you. Yes, I am an aging wreck, but boy life is good!

DONE!!!!!!!!! FINITO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, July 17th, 2007

I know I know, I’ve been slacking…but….today I write to very gladly report that….I’M DONE, FINITO, THROUGH!!! Radiation is over!!! The left part of my chest looks like a square hot iron sat on it for a while, it burns around the edges (the middle is still numb from surgery) but I’ m done, finito, through. I have a few docs appointments to keep, and a couple more tests, but even the major ones should be out of the way too (at least until the plastic reconstruction surgeries). I look forward to a while without tests and needles. And to my sisters’ visit. I can’t believe this is it! I know, post-treatment depression will kick in at some point, but today I’m going to enjoy the flavor of freedom!!!!!!!!

Ho finito!!!!! Ieri ho fatto l’ultima radiazione. La parte sinistra del petto sembra ci sia passato un ferro da stiro quadrato e molto caldo, brucia ai margini (il resto non ha nessuna sensibilita’) ma in poco tempo passera’ anche questo. Anche le procedure piu’ grosse sono finite, ho solo un paio di visite e cose minori, almeno per un po’ di tempo, fino a che non devo fare le operazioni al seno per la ricostruzione. Non voglio vedere dottori, macchinari e aghi per almeno un mese o due!!! Vabbe’, forse sara’ di meno, ma per ora mi godo questo gioviale primo giorno di liberta’.